How to Use "Reframing" to Keep Your Players
Focused Every Day

-By Dave Cross

I recently found a story that makes a great point
in terms of helping our players to get through
the every day "ups and downs" that so often
distract young female athletes, and in turn,
negatively effect the performance and improvement
of our team:

The Trouble Tree

-Author unknown

The carpenter I hired to help me restore an old
farmhouse had just finished a rough first day on
the job.  A flat tire made him lose an hour of
work, his electric saw quit, and now his ancient
pickup truck refused to start.

While I drove him home, he sat in stony silence.
Upon arrival, he invited me in to meet his
family.  As we walked toward the front door, he
paused briefly at a small tree, touching tips of
the branches with both hands.  When opening the
door, he underwent an amazing transformation.
His tanned face was wreathed in smiles.  He
hugged his two small children and gave his wife a
kiss.

Afterward, he walked me to the care.  We passed
the tree and my curiosity got the better of me.
I asked him bout what I had seen him do earlier.
"Oh, that's my trouble tree," he replied.  "I
know I can't help having troubles on the job, but
one thing's for sure, troubles don't belong in
the house with my wife and children.  So I just
hang them up on the tree every night when I come
home.  Then in the morning I pick them up again."

"Funny thing is," he smiled, "when I come out in
the morning to pick'em up, there aren't nearly as
many as I remember hanging up the night before."

We've never had an actual "Trouble Tree" in our
gym, but this story reminded me of an idea we do
use. I always stress to my players, as I'm sure
most of us do, that they need to leave their
personal problems outside of the gym when they
walk in for practice or a match.  Yes, this is a
very solid concept, that I'm sure anyone who has
ever coached would surely agree with.  There is
nothing worse than an athlete who is distracted -
their level of performance always suffers.

But simply saying this to your players isn't
enough.  I feel you need to give your players a
little more in terms of clearing their mind of
their personal problems and focusing on the
team's task of the day-whether it be to play a
match well, or simply to go through a productive
practice session.

Here's what we tell our players:

"When you walk into the locker room to change for
practice, take your problems, whatever is on your
mind that is bothering you,  and put it in your
locker.  Just leave it there and come out and
focus on playing volleyball.  Don't worry, when
you finish and go back into the locker room, your
problems will still be there waiting for you-and
you can become as upset about them as you wish
once again."

And really, all I am getting them to do is use
our "Reframing Concept" that we talk about in our
first book, "Volleyball Cybernetics".  I am
taking the meaning they are giving the situation,
"This day stinks, I'm really in a bad mood", and
giving them a new meaning to apply to it: "Yea,
it's been a bad day, but now I get to go out in
the gym and play the game I love with my
friends/teammates.  I can't do anything about my
problem while I'm in the gym, so I'm not going to
think about it- I'm just going to go have fun,
and that will make me feel a whole lot better."

Another idea I have used many times with
individual players who come to me to share the
"bad day" they've had is this:

"Yea, I understand what you are saying-it hasn't
been a good day so far.  But you know what is
cool? For the next two hours you get to do what
you love-play volleyball.  While you're in the
gym, you can't do anything about (whatever is
bothering them), so why not enjoy this time
playing the game you love?  See, your day is
going to start getting better right now, isn't
that cool?"

This simple statement usually works wonders. This
is another application of "Reframing".   I am
taking the meaning they are giving the situation,
"This days stinks, I've got this problem....."
and giving them a new meaning to replace it with:
"Yea, it hasn't been the greatest day, but now
it's going to get better- because I get to play
the sport I love with my teammates-and that
really is cool."

We also point out to them that if they choose to
bring their problems out of the locker room with
them and into the gym during "volleyball time",
that they are actually being very selfish-they
are putting themselves in front of their
teammates and coaches. This is another use of
"Reframing"-giving their behavior of negative
meaning they won't like- or hopefully accept.

The thought of being "selfish" is a very powerful
deterrent to female athletes.  Being part of a
team or group is incredibly important to the
female psyche-this has been researched and
reported again and again by behavioral
psychologists focusing on athletic performance.
They hate being thought of as "selfish", and
using this as negative motivator is very
effective when they are having difficulty just
leaving their problems in the locker room.  It
isn't something you yell at them about-usually it
just takes a quiet one-one reminder to give them
the extra "push" necessary to focus in on the
team's task of the day.   But, I will only use
this approach if it is obvious the other ideas
haven't worked for this player in the current
situation.  It is almost the last resort.

So, then what is the "last resort"?  I've only
done this a couple of times in my career-but in
those cases, I thought it was necessary.  If
nothing else has worked, and you have a player
that is so distracted that they just can't
perform, try this:

"I understand you're having a bad day, but you
know we need you to let it go and focus on
volleyball right now.  If you can't do that, then
you can just go home for the day.  I know you
don't want to do that, but we can't have you
bringing everyone else down with your attitude
right now.  This isn't a punishment, but I have
to do this for the team.  So, either get yourself
focused on what we are doing, or go on home and
come back tomorrow ready to go.  I'm sure you're
teammates will understand." Again, the situation
has been "Reframed": "Yes, you can keep your
focus as it is, but you are going to have to
leave us for the day-you can't stay the way you
are and stay with us."

Has a player ever taken me up on this one?  Nope.
But it has helped in those rare cases when I had
to take this step.  They always know deep down
that they'd rather be at practice than anywhere
else when they feel this way-usually it's a case
where they are looking for sympathy for their
problem.  And I'm simply telling them, "I
understand, but I can't allow this behavior, so
if things are truly that bad, we'll excuse you
for the day."  In other words, "If you really
need it, you will have our support, but not now,
not during volleyball time, right now, the team
needs you."

Now, let me clarify something here:  I'm
referring to those situations we've all dealt
with where, in reality, the problem the player is
focusing on is not nearly as bad as they are
making it.  As adults, we know that.  But as a
young person, many times they are simply making
things out to be much worse than they really are.
You know the types of situations I am talking
about here, a fight with their boyfriend, a spat
with their best friend,  a teacher yelled at them
in class, they did poorly on a test or quiz, or
they messed up somehow and they know their
parents are going to be unhappy with them. (I am
not talking about those truly terrible situations
that sometimes a young person is forced to deal
with.  Those are obviously totally different, as
I'm sure you will agree.  In instances such as
these, I have immediately excused a player from
practice or a match, if that is what they want,
with no attempts to "bring them around".)

However, the "everyday situations"  must be
treated this way-because when coaching a group of
young females, these "problems" will always be
popping up.  It's simply how they are-very
focused on "social things" and how others are
viewing them at the current time, in their mind.
If we don't, then they number of focused
practices and matches your team will have will be
very few- and so will your team's successes.

Think about it:  How many times have you heard a
player, when attempting to explain a poor
performance, say, "I was just having a bad
day-I've got a lot on my mind."  We have to give
them "mental tools" to deal with these
situations,  to help them find the strength to
focus on the task at hand and perform as well as
they can.  After all, isn't that what we, as
adults, are expected to do in our jobs?  You see,
in doing this, we are not only helping them to be
a better player in the long run, but we are also
teaching them a very important life lesson-one
that the carpenter had learned so well-the power
of "Reframing".

-Dave Cross
National Director
Yes I Can Volleyball